The Sunset on Sunday

Do I want to be in love?

Heartbreak scares me. Stories of relationships, once perfect and predicted to last a lifetime, shattered now into a million shards. Tears of an aching heart on your shoulder as they pour out to you what’s left of their broken soul.

Things like this make me want to be alone for  the rest of my life. Too many commitments, too many problems.  Love causes problems therefore love must be avoided. People cannot be trusted so don’t let people in.

But then, love is beautiful. I then realize that no amount of negativity towards the emotion will deny that everyone wants to be loved.

Walking in a crowded place, surrounded by twos. Hands held, fingers clasped, heads bent, soft laughter – I love you.

Who doesn’t dream of that? Every girl wants her fairytale to end with a ‘happily ever after’.

I know I do. 

Heartbreak Warfare

The magic that is John Mayer.

Once you want it to begin,
No one really ever wins
In heartbreak warfare

If you want more love,
why don't you say so?


If you look at it that way, we've all been to war.
Every heartache, a bomb. 
Every tear, a bullet hole.
Every scream, a hand grenade.

How many times have we, perhaps literally, cut ourselves open and laid exposed to the oncoming enemy?
The enemy who, once upon a time, used to be our best friend. 
How many times have we allowed them to hurt us and then disappear into the distance while we are left to nurse our streaming wounds?
How many times have we lost, or lost ourselves, trying to get back to who we were before it all started?
We are all warriors.

ADHD

It's not a matter of concentration, it's just...the absence of it.

I could pay attention to you for hours but the fact of the matter is...maybe I just don't want to.

I'd rather watch the lights flashing outside, so bright...do you want me to?

They make better friends than you ever will be...wouldn't you agree? 

When it came to me, you had the same problem...nothing I said mattered to you.

Now here's a taste...of your own medicine. 

Don't come back until you've finished it all.

Just for a minute.

Why don't we just sit down for a moment and just listen? 
To each other. 
What do you have to say - Here's what I think. 
I understand - Can you help me out? 


That's our problem. We don't take the time to listen...or to care. 
What we hear, we twist into lies. We hurt others with our warped misinterpretations of the truth. All we seem to stick is to our convictions, be they real beliefs or fabricated fairytales. 
It's time we listened to the next person - what they have to say may actually ring true - true enough to cancel out all your lies. 


Sam.F asked me if it was the same with true lies. What if you've listened countless times only to find out that you've been listening to 'their' side of the truth, which is actually all lies? And the fact that you were gracious enough to hear 'them' out is what tears you apart when they decide they've had enough of you? Because you can never know the truth, because truth is different with everyone. 
Your truth is my little white lie. 
Your tangled web of lies, I believe to be true.
The trick is, again, to listen. Judge if what you're listening to is worth actually listening to. There has to be a first time and yes, you will feel like an idiot for listening. But let that be a lesson - don't make the same mistake again because if you do, you're practically asking to be lied to. And to 'them', it's an invitation to walk all over you.
You're worth more than that.

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